Responsibility is a very important trait when it comes to emotional health. Personal responsibility can empower a person to take control over all aspects of his/her life and as result, circumvent the painful role of becoming a victim.
Feeling as if one is a victim is like feeing like all of the air has been punched out of you. Desperation sets in as you wait and hope for that inhalation of oxygen. In turn, desperation brings with it feelings of hopelessness and/or helplessness. This state further increases feelings of negativity, which seep into other aspects of your life. It can impact your ability to make good decisions, increase conflicts in relationships and cause financial hardships, just to name a few consequences.
Feelings of victimization can entangle a person in a negative web that appears bigger and stronger than the person and this gives an illusion that you are trapped. It is a very dangerous place for a person to be because it can either lead to resignation or, on the flip side, aggressive toward self or others.
While it is true that we do not always have control over the circumstances that affect us, we always have the choice as to how to respond. Even in the darkest of circumstances, Viktor E. Frankl, author of Man’s Search For Meaning stated, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
If you discover that you are in a hole due to life’s circumstances or due to your own poor judgement, you always have a choice in how to respond. Here are a few questions to ask yourself: Is now the time to reach out for support from family and/or friends? Is the situation serious enough that professional assistance is appropriate?
By making the decision to seek help, it puts you back in control of your life, taking personal responsibility. It removes you from a predicament of further attracting negativity, which is what victimization allows as it is a response to desperation. By taking an action, you light up the path, even if only dimly at first, to see your next step.
What is your choice?
By: Maritza Rodriguez-Arseneau
*The views expressed by our authors are personal opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of the CCPA