Tag Archives: violence

“The Quickest Way to the Truth”: Confronting Sexual Harassment in the Workplace and Beyond

Posted by: Denise Hall on June 22, 2016 3:47 pm

From the plea bargain and previous acquittal of Gian Ghomeshi to the sexual harassment class action suit against the RCMP and other high profile cases, sexual harassment is definitely in the news but are we seeing justice done? Christy Clark said recently that sexual abuse, assault and  harassment are a part of women’s everyday lives. These acts of violence and abuse continue to occur at alarming rates. A CBC guest Rebecca Solnit on the Sunday Edition’s  June 19, 2016 discussion on violence in the US  indicated that a rape occurs every 107 seconds and spousal abuse every 17 seconds. Why are we not doing enough to protect women in their homes and their workplaces?

The CBC executive whose quote I have used in the title was abused at work while a male coworker stood by. She agreed to an apology and a peace bond from Ghomeshi instead of enduring a trial. She may be quite right in stating that the truth can get tangled up in the justice system and the court of human opinion. Forgoing her anonymity, she felt the truth would best be served by making a statement about the abuse. Perpetrators seem to be able to continue harassing and abusing and evade responsibility for their actions. Gian Ghomeshi was acquitted of six charges in the first court case and PeasandHammerbarely offered an apology or took any responsibility for his actions in the second.

In the memoir “No One To Tell” Janet Merlo, a former RCMP officer in British Columbia, outlines the abuse and gender inequality she endured during her time with the force. Merlo was named as the representative plaintiff in the class action suit of over 100 women against the organization. Going through the courts is not working very well for the victims, mostly women. So what can be done to stop the rampant abuse and bring the perpetrators to account?

As a therapist I work with victims of sexual harassment, rape, physical assault and violent acts mainly perpetrated by men, many unreported. Discussing this issue with other therapists they tell me that the women they work with state that if they had a chance to go back they would not report sexual harassment and sexual assault. They say it is just too horrendous an experience to report. Furthermore many victims report losing their jobs while the offender(s) keep(s) their position. Women in male dominated occupations tend to fare pretty badly in the places they work.  I have heard reports directly from women in construction jobs, police forces, and the military.

Politics aside, Christy Clark, BC Premier, recently disclosed being a victim of an assault when she was 13 years old. She said she never told anyone because of the shame associated with being a victim. Some people are cynical and say that her report was politically motivated. I am thinking this is not the case.  Most women feel a high degree of shame associated with being a victim and I question why women and, specifically our premier, would talk about a traumatic and highly intimate situation for political purposes? Claims from perpetrators that women report for financial or other reasons are usually way off base. There is no amount of money in the world that would make up with the horrific circumstances, terror and public scrutiny involved with disclosing sexual harassment or assault. Also, research on recanting suggests that many victims recant because of the consequences of going through with the accusations for their families and the community.

I watched a Norwegian movie last week called HEVN (“revenge”) and the heroine of the film was bent on revenging the rape and subsequent suicide of her younger sister who was in her teens when the rape occurred. Initially she was going to kill the perpetrator but settled on setting him up and stripping him of his family and stature in the community. If the court system does not provide justice then must victims take retribution into their own hands? The problem with doing so as an “eye for an eye” suggests, will leave both parties injured, most likely badly. More succinctly, violence is not the answer.Violence is the problem.

The women in the RCMP have initiated a class action suit to settle their grievances around sexual assault and sexual harassment. Maybe civil action is better for compensating victims. Civil actions have a lower burden of truth and they can provide compensation for suffering and loss of positions the victims aspired to and felt proud of.

WorkSafe BC now accepts sexual harassment and bullying under their mental stress provisions if the abuse if work related. It is also incumbent on employers to have a system of regulation and protection in place. Certainly the criminal courts did not appear to serve Gian Ghomeshi’s victims well. Many victims just keep quiet and perpetrators continue to harass, abuse, and rape because they believe they can and they believe THAT THEY WILL NEVER GET CAUGHT.

Another high profile example is the Stanford sexual assault case where the perpetrator’s father wrote a letter decrying the six month sentence for his son, Brock Turner, stating it was too harsh for “20 minutes of action”. What if he got 20 months for each minute of action? Legal experts have said that this sentence was more in line with a “first offence of burglary or auto theft”. Another comment from Danielle De Smeth, a California based criminal attorney, was that “it emboldens those of privilege or an athletic background”. Sure does! Two young black men were hung in the 1942 on a bridge on the Chickasawhay river for being within 10 feet of a white teenage girl.

So what is the quickest way to the truth and how are we going to stop perpetrators from sexually abusing? Sexual assault and harassment is a technique of power as is withdrawing reproductive services for women. Rape is used by soldiers in war zones to totally control the vanquished. Racism is more of an issue in economically stressful times. Maybe, sexual assault and harassment is like racism where the perpetrators objectify and dehumanize their prey because they feel they are losing power economically and politically. Mark Lepine killed 14 women in Montreal for just that reason. In spousal abuse perpetrators keep their partners powerless so they will not leave. Sexual abuse and assault are the tools that perpetrators use to subjugate women and children.

Maybe the solutions to stopping abuse lie beyond the criminal courts in changing workplace culture, economic inequality and societal attitudes. As long as women remain unequal economically and societally along with ethnic minorities and are kept powerless to bring the abusers to account, the abuse will continue despite the criminality of the acts. Even if we have regulations that prohibit sexual harassment in the workplace, many victims will not speak up because of fear of losing their jobs, being ostracized for speaking up, and concern about the onerous process of going through a system that is fraught with difficulties. This is a challenging issue and we must do a better job of protecting women in the workplace and in the community.

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*The views expressed by our authors are personal opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of the CCPA

Adult Bullying: Under the Bully’s Mask

Posted by: Jonathan Delisle on June 10, 2015 8:33 am

anonymous-438427_640Ever wonder why bullies bully? What’s their problem? That’s exactly the point… they are struggling with a problem. Bullying is an act of violence, and violence is an expression of anger. Bullies have an anger problem. Following Karyn Hall PhD’s thoughts (2012), the bully’s anger serves a few possible purposes: to protect himself, to control, and to connect:

Emotional Shield: Bullies fight hard to protect themselves from feeling powerless. As former victims themselves, they’ve had their share of feeling powerless. Anger is an empowering feeling that pushes them to break that all-too-familiar barrier of paralyzing fear.

Source of Control: Bullies fear to lose their victim as a scapegoat, which they desperately hold on to. Through anger, they can intimidate and manipulate others into submission to play the abuse game by their rules.

Safer Connection: Dr. Hall paraphrases Steven Stosny’s words on core hurts from his book Treating Attachment Abuse (1995): “He identifies core hurts, some of which are feeling ignored, unimportant, accused, guilty, untrustworthy, devalued, rejected, powerless, and unlovable”. These core hurts are the result of serious narcissistic injuries. They give rise to difficult emotions, such as fear, sadness, depression, vulnerability, etc. Anger then becomes a way of connecting with other people without having to deal with those difficult emotions.

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*The views expressed by our authors are personal opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of the CCPA

The Psychology of Hate

Posted by: Asa Don Brown on April 9, 2014 12:55 pm

“Personal responsibility is the willingness to completely accept choices that we have made throughout our lives.”
~ Asa Don Brown, Waiting to Live

 
Hate has a pathological effect upon the psyche of the individual.  The pathology of hate is commonly linked to those that provide us protection and nurturing early in the early stages of our lives.  The nurturing of a parent or guardian can be the catalyst of a variety of psychological and psychiatric conditions.  It is not to say that hate cannot be spurred on by organic conditions of the mind, but we know that the greatest influence of hate is directly related to the nurturing received in our youth.

While psychological and psychiatric conditions of each individual may develop beyond the experiences per childhood; the presets surrounding the personal ideological viewpoints, theories,  ethical and moral compasses are undoubtedly influenced by those in direct contact with our own lives.

The makeup of hate is comprised of uncertainty, insecurity, loneliness, awkwardness, lack of confidence, self-doubt, unassertiveness, timidity, anxiety, instability, vulnerability, and defenselessness.  Whereas to love, a person has humility, security, assurance, acceptance, attachments, tenderness, patience, understanding, compassion and most of all, tolerance.

INTOLERANCE

The human race is an intolerable species.  We are seldom welcoming of varying views, belief systems, and behaviors.  We shun or outwardly reject those who differ from our own person.  As a species, we are more apt to disregard or completely ignore anyone we disagree with.  Such intolerance is no different than blatant acts of hate and discrimination.  You may be asking yourself, how can ignoring or shunning be as reprehensible as violent acts.  While the acts of shunning or ignoring lack the physical violence of the fist; shunning and ignoring are intentionally setting a precedent of intolerance and bigotry.  It is this sort of behavior, attitudes, and percepts that is directly linked to instilling negative emotions (i.e. fear, distrust, hatred, worry, and personal distress).  The prejudices of an individual can invoke rage, hostilities, and an overall spirit of negativity.

While the intolerance begins within the mind and psyche of the individual, seldom does the intolerance keep isolated within the mind of the individual.  Sadly, the venomous nature of intolerance is capable of creeping itself slowly into the minds of others who directly and indirectly interact with the ill mind.

The spoils of intolerance are capable of diminishing and destroying every thread of communication.  It is the egregious nature of intolerance that spurs on the prejudices and bigotry  developed within the minds of those effected by such hate.

HATE’S VICTIMS

The victims of hate may be your neighbor, your friend, your father, your mother, your brother, your sister, your grandparent, your employer, and/or your enemy.  While the victims may range in age, race, gender, and intellectual quotient (IQ); the desire of such discrimination is to reach  maximum proportions.

Hate has intentions on breaking down the unity of all humanity.  It does not cease with the individual, but seeks to infiltrate all aspects of personal and global thinking.  The injection of such venom penetrates each aspect of humanity whether on an individual scale or a global perspective.  It may include ethnicity, religion, national origin, genetic makeup, socioeconomic status, career choices and/or a personal disability.  The ultimate goal of all hate crimes is intended on reaching systemic levels, thus reinforcing the intentions of hate.

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*The views expressed by our authors are personal opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of the CCPA

Preventing and Managing School Violence

Posted by: Asa Don Brown on June 6, 2012 10:49 am

Children are barometers of the chaos that exists within their lives.  If a child’s internal and external lives are proving emotionally gregarious, then life can prove personally limitless.  However, if life is proving egregious in nature, then all forms of life may feel personally bleak and without personal merit. 

WHAT IS THE CAUSATION OF SCHOOL VIOLENCE?

Children who act out violently are frequently displaying signs of desperation. Desperation may be fueled by a child feeling excluded, judged, disrespected, disapproved, disavowed, or unloved.

Acts of school violence have left many with feelings of frustration, indifference, and a feeling that schools utterly are incompetent.  The reality is, school administrators, teachers, parents, and students themselves are feeling hopeless and desperate to bring normalcy to the academic process.   

ANGER

Anger is most commonly the root cause of school violence.   What is anger?  Anger is a strong emotional response to a situation, event, circumstance, or person.  It is this displeasure with life at school, in their home, or globally.

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*The views expressed by our authors are personal opinions and do not necessarily reflect the views of the CCPA