{"id":5688,"date":"2015-04-27T12:00:07","date_gmt":"2015-04-27T16:00:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ccpa.scottbuckingham.ca\/blog\/?p=4022"},"modified":"2015-04-27T12:00:07","modified_gmt":"2015-04-27T16:00:07","slug":"walking-our-walkwhen-counsellors-dont-do-as-they-say","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ccpa-accp.ca\/fr\/walking-our-walkwhen-counsellors-dont-do-as-they-say\/","title":{"rendered":"Walking our Walk\u2026When Counsellors Don\u2019t DO as they SAY"},"content":{"rendered":"

I will admit it \u2013 I have had several moments in my past counselling experience where I found myself giving feedback that I, myself, could probably have taken. Whether it was managing negative thinking, using healthier coping skills or just eating more mindfully, I could have \u201cwalked the walk\u201d a bit better than I was.<\/p>\n

Set boundaries. Set goals. Avoid toxic people. Use \u201cI\u201d statements. Identify your values. Understand and soothe your inner critic. All helpful psychological tools we can use to work towards greater self-awareness and personal growth.<\/p>\n

Yet how are WE doing? Yeah, us \u2013 the \u201cprofessionals\u201d who have made personal growth our business.<\/em><\/p>\n

\"people-690953_640\"<\/a>Interesting question\u2026<\/p>\n

As far as I\u2019m concerned, we fall on a significantly broad continuum in this regard. Personally, I\u2019ve met counsellors who\u2019ve struggled with addictions, Major Depression Disorder or Bordeline Personality Disorder; presented as highly defensive, passive-aggressive, or traumatized. I\u2019ve heard from clients about various transgressions of boundaries or negligence from their counsellors, and from counsellors about their out-of-control or toxic colleagues.<\/p>\n

We\u2019re human. We all make mistakes. But how can we strive to uphold our ethical code of conduct while allowing ourselves an understandable slip now and then? Where do we draw the line so we can honestly say we are doing our best to work in alignment with our values and professional expectations?<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll never forget the time a supervisor of mine said it was okay if the staff showed up hungover to work, as long as they could do their jobs. The staff consisted of addictions recovery counsellors.\u00a0\u00a0 Many of us weren\u2019t in recovery ourselves, but I still felt funny with the whole idea \u2013 if we are supposed to be helping others learn how to deal with life\u2019s challenges without abusing substances, shouldn\u2019t we perhaps do the same, at least <\/em>when we had work the next day?<\/p>\n

I really believe that you can help another successfully as long as you are slightly farther down the path; not perfect, not enlightened, not even fully \u201cself-actualized\u201d \u2013 just farther down the path.<\/p>\n

I also think that one reason many counsellors don\u2019t do the work they need to do is that they (falsely) believe they should have it all \u201cfigured out\u201d (or at least the big bits) by the time they have a client sitting across from them. This just isn\u2019t true, nor is it helpful.\u00a0\u00a0 We are all works in progress. Counsellors and clients alike.<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll never forget taking my first \u201cstress leave\u201d (yes, I took more than one!) \u2013 the shame and fear were only exceeded by the extreme Compassion Fatigue I was experiencing. I had chest pains, was drinking too much, crying too easily, numbing out and pulling back from clients. Looking back, I shake my head in wonder at how much suffering I caused myself, when I could have sought help so much sooner. And healed so much faster. We need to start recognizing our limitations and allow space and time for our own growth, in order for us to best serve our clients. We need to sharpen the saw every once in a while.<\/p>\n

My suggestions coming from my own and others\u2019 experiences: Seek support. Take time to heal what needs to be healed. Be gentle with yourself.\u00a0\u00a0 Refer clients that have issues that you haven\u2019t worked through in yourself yet.\u00a0\u00a0 Be honest.\u00a0\u00a0 Here\u2019s to walking our walk, as well as talking our talk.<\/p>\n

By: Siri Brown, M.A., CCC<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I will admit it \u2013 I have had several moments in my past counselling experience where I found myself giving feedback that I, myself, could probably have taken. Whether it was managing negative thinking, using healthier coping skills or just eating more mindfully, I could have \u201cwalked the walk\u201d a bit better than I was. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1001019,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[118],"tags":[25,1121,87,1122,119,93,1123,1124],"class_list":["post-5688","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-selfcareforcounsellors","tag-counselling","tag-growth","tag-psychotherapy","tag-siri-brown","tag-stress","tag-support","tag-talk-the-talk","tag-walk-the-walk"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nWalking our Walk\u2026When Counsellors Don\u2019t DO as they SAY - L'Association canadienne de counseling et de psychoth\u00e9rapie<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.ccpa-accp.ca\/walking-our-walkwhen-counsellors-dont-do-as-they-say\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Walking our Walk\u2026When Counsellors Don\u2019t DO as they SAY - L'Association canadienne de counseling et de psychoth\u00e9rapie\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I will admit it \u2013 I have had several moments in my past counselling experience where I found myself giving feedback that I, myself, could probably have taken. 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