I ended up in the ER last week, stitches to my right (dominant) hand, resulting from a losing battle with a broken glass.\u00a0 Exiting the hospital at 11:30pm, I was faced with a decision \u2013 to go, or not to go, to work the next day?\u00a0 Self-care I can trumpet to my clients, but oh-how-complicated it becomes as I face my own choices.\u00a0 This blog entry is about my own journey navigating an acceptable balance between my professional and personal responsibilities.\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0 I hope that it might help \u201cnormalize\u201d this challenge for other clinicians, dedicated, as I am, to the clients we serve.<\/p>\n
Facts:\u00a0\u00a0 I have 3 stitches in my hand.\u00a0 I am not in any amount of inordinate pain as a result.\u00a0 I have almost 7hrs of sleep available to me.\u00a0 I have a fairly full schedule tomorrow including clients without telephones or other means of contact.\u00a0\u00a0 It is only one more day of work before the weekend.\u00a0\u00a0 I\u00a0 just spent two plus hours in the hospital (second one I visited \u2013 first one, the ER was closed).\u00a0 It would help to keep the wound dry and immobilized for at least 24hrs.\u00a0 I am mad at myself for what I consider a stupid, unnecessary injury.\u00a0\u00a0 What to do?<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
My old self, the \u201csuck it up, your clients have dealt with more on a daily basis\u201d was dominating my thought process.\u00a0\u00a0 My newer, more hesitant, self-doubting self was gently questioning the need to \u201cpush through\u201d my own thoughts and feelings \u2013 what about self-care?\u00a0 What does that mean, anyway?\u00a0 How do we decide what constitutes a \u201cself-care\u201d moment from a \u201cwhat doesn\u2019t kill you makes you stronger\u201d moment?<\/p>\n
The answer (for me) is that there is no one answer \u2013 each moment, situation and decision needs to be assessed on its own.\u00a0 Are we not constantly honouring that concept as we meet each client \u201cwhere they are at?\u201d \u00a0\u00a0Applying that same process to our own experience however can, and usually does, bring up our own issues. \u00a0I personally think that\u2019s a very good thing.\u00a0 \u00a0<\/p>\n
For me, in my family of origin, the mantra was \u201csuck it up\u201d.\u00a0\u00a0 Being tough was equated with being a successful human being. \u00a0\u00a0People who whined, complained, or played the \u201cvictim\u201d were not taking control of their lives.\u00a0\u00a0 My personal and professional beliefs were in harsh conflict with each other.<\/p>\n
\u00a0Now only 5 and 1\/2 hours of sleep available\u2026<\/p>\n
I decided to take the next day off.\u00a0 Making the decision was easy \u2013 processing it, not so much.\u00a0 Part of what helped me decide was choosing to look within, take a moment to assess my own needs, and not feel apologetic about prioritizing my own self-care.\u00a0 We are helpers \u2013 we have chosen a profession that can be perceived as self-sacrificial in nature.\u00a0 I challenge that.\u00a0 I truly believe that by taking care of ourselves, we allow others to do the same; friends, family, and clients.\u00a0 We communicate, through our actions, our deepest beliefs about self-love.\u00a0\u00a0 When we honour our own needs, we allow others to do the same.\u00a0 Powerful stuff \u2013 much more powerful than the words we speak.\u00a0 In fact, it really is how we live and the choices we make that shows others the self-worth we feel.\u00a0 And, as a result, creates space for them to do so as well.<\/p>\n
Stitches and all, I am grateful for this learning that has enabled me to look within, question my core beliefs, and choose my own way.\u00a0 I slept in, watched movies, drank coffee and generally lounged about.\u00a0 I even got my boyfriend to do the dishes, despite the pang of guilt I felt when asking (yes, I\u2019m still learning\u2026).\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0<\/p>\n
I love the work I do.\u00a0 I am honoured to work with the people that entrust me with their deepest fears, regrets, uncertainties and doubts.\u00a0 If I model self-love, how can that possibly be bad?\u00a0 I encourage all of us, myself included, to take care of ourselves without apology.\u00a0 We are committed to helping.\u00a0 Let us commit that helping to include everybody \u2013 including ourselves.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I ended up in the ER last week, stitches to my right (dominant) hand, resulting from a losing battle with a broken glass.\u00a0 Exiting the hospital at 11:30pm, I was faced with a decision \u2013 to go, or not to go, to work the next day?\u00a0 Self-care I can trumpet to my clients, but oh-how-complicated […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1001019,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[118],"tags":[520,496,521,522,523,524,117,489],"class_list":["post-5403","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-selfcareforcounsellors","tag-core-beliefs","tag-counsellor-self-care","tag-family-of-origin","tag-healthy-boundaries","tag-helping-professionals","tag-modeling-self-care","tag-self-care","tag-self-worth"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n