{"id":5351,"date":"2011-10-10T12:00:42","date_gmt":"2011-10-10T16:00:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ccpa.scottbuckingham.ca\/blog\/?p=1190"},"modified":"2015-07-03T16:15:31","modified_gmt":"2015-07-03T20:15:31","slug":"blog-11","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ccpa-accp.ca\/fr\/blog-11\/","title":{"rendered":"Blog #11"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/landscape1.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-1192\" title=\"landscape\" src=\"\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/landscape1-300x225.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"300\" height=\"225\" \/><\/a>As a reminder, the thoughts expressed here are mine alone \u2013 they do not, necessarily reflect the beliefs of counsellors in general or the Canadian Counselling and Psychotherapy Association.<\/p>\n<p>Last time I started talking about my own experience with counseling.\u00a0 I recognized two points:\u00a0 1. that I don\u2019t think I make a very good client and 2, that the stigma about going to counselling is real.\u00a0 I talked briefly about the counsellor as the client and somehow went onto a tangent about crossing from the cognitive realm to the emotional realm.\u00a0 As a matter of fact I don\u2019t think I\u2019m quite done talking about emotions.\u00a0 Why do people struggle so much with accepting their emotions?\u00a0 I know why I avoid my feelings (counselling must be working). My emotional responses played significantly into my ability to escalate or de-escalate high crisis situations working with children and families.\u00a0 I also had to learn to de-personalize my emotional responses due to the nature of the issues I was dealing with (sexual abuse victims and perpetrators, suicide, victims of violence).\u00a0 Basically, I had to learn to \u201cshut off\u201d if I were to have any longevity in this field.\u00a0 People start being trained to not feel at a very young age.\u00a0 As a baby, we cry and almost instantaneously we are lifted cuddled and nurtured until we stop.\u00a0 When we cry, our parents change us, play, distract, and\/or stick a pacifier or bottle in our mouths.\u00a0 As we get older, our education continues.\u00a0 When we are sad, parents, family and friends immediately start to cheer us up.\u00a0 When we are angry, we are told to not be angry.\u00a0 When we are afraid, we are taught to avoid the things that scare us, or are shamed into not being afraid (its only a little itty bitty spider, you shouldn\u2019t be scared).\u00a0 In fact, it seems that whenever we express anything other than happiness or love, others went well out of their way to make us stop feeling that way and to make us feel better.\u00a0 From an infant we are taught that it is not o.k. to feel a certain way and that we should do anything including shoving whatever makes us feel better into our mouths (doughnuts, cigarettes, alcohol, drugs) to make it stop.<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>The pleasure principal; seek pleasure, avoid pain:\u00a0 human nature, certainly, but nurtured from a VERY early age.\u00a0 We develop the habit of pacifying undesirable emotions and the emotions remain \u2013 sometimes suppressed momentarily, but certainly still there.\u00a0 How do you interrupt and reteach years of conditioning?\u00a0 As I mentioned in the last posting, it seems like the moment we start to challenge and problem-solve, the client starts to resist.<\/p>\n<p>Mindfulness involves drawing and maintaining awareness and eventual acceptance of the personal experience.\u00a0 Awareness of breathing, awareness while eating, awareness and acceptance of the feeling of sadness is a progressive process that needs to be learned and practiced.\u00a0 Therapist, heal thyself and practice mindfulness many times during the day, then model and encourage that process with your clients.\u00a0 Start today with breathing\u2026. Now\u2026 no really, now\u2026.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>As a reminder, the thoughts expressed here are mine alone \u2013 they do not, necessarily reflect the beliefs of counsellors in general or the Canadian Counselling and Psychotherapy Association. Last time I started talking about my own experience with counseling.\u00a0 I recognized two points:\u00a0 1. that I don\u2019t think I make a very good client [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1001005,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[29],"tags":[396,324],"class_list":["post-5351","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-counsellingandpsychotherapyincanada","tag-emotions","tag-mindfulness"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.8 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Blog #11 - L&#039;Association canadienne de counseling et de psychoth\u00e9rapie<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.ccpa-accp.ca\/blog-11\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Blog #11 - L&#039;Association canadienne de counseling et de psychoth\u00e9rapie\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"As a reminder, the thoughts expressed here are mine alone \u2013 they do not, necessarily reflect the beliefs of counsellors in general or the Canadian Counselling and Psychotherapy Association. 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