{"id":4198,"date":"2015-05-26T12:37:52","date_gmt":"2015-05-26T16:37:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/ccpa.scottbuckingham.ca\/blog\/?p=4198"},"modified":"2015-05-26T12:37:52","modified_gmt":"2015-05-26T16:37:52","slug":"domestic-violence-sensitivities-and-reminders","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ccpa-accp.ca\/fr\/domestic-violence-sensitivities-and-reminders\/","title":{"rendered":"Domestic Violence Sensitivities and Reminders"},"content":{"rendered":"

At the moment I don\u2019t have clients victimized by domestic violence in my practice in Paris. So going to the 2nd<\/sup> Annual International Forum on Domestic Violence recently came out of a longstanding want to better understand one of the worst types of relationship outcomes and life situation traps, that a poor woman and a man (to be pitied until the day comes when he stops all forms of abuse) could possibly encounter. It is true I wanted to learn what a woman in a mixed couple with a Frenchman, the most probable instance here in the Anglophone community, might face in the way of exit challenges. But as a child who knew domestic violence in my own home growing up, I admit to wanting new sensitivities to any dimension of the embodied \u2018separation\u2019 pain and reflection, that a woman contemplating leaving the man they had children with and to whom they once may have pledged their lives, including the brutal reality of starting over from scratch, encounters.<\/p>\n

This is what I left with\u00a0in terms of list of vigilance for women here in France\u00a0:<\/p>\n

– realize and connect with \u00ab\u00a0what is going on\u00a0\u00bb
\n– generate possible responses and choices
\n– safety plan including organizing the protection for the kids
\n– log the \u00ab\u00a0proof\u00a0\u00bb with visits to doctors, etc., ensuring the story has \u2018punctuation and accumulation\u2019<\/p>\n


\n– conceptualize the leaving a violent relationship in the \u2018long term\u2019
\n– enlist your support \u2013 a friend, a family member \u2013 for help with finding shelter services, legal advice and represention, etc.
\n– if a woman worries about the police taking complaint of domestic abuse seriously, because of reasons of language or otherwise, go with a friend to go to the police
\n– judges might ask for expert scrutiny to assess trauma
\n– a \u00ab\u00a0rappel \u00e0 la loi\u00a0\u00bb (i.e.\u00a0\u2018reminder of the law\u2019) if that is what is handed to the accused, can be considered a \u2018proof\u2019 and \u2018recognition\u2019 of violence
\n– \u00ab\u00a0la loi\u00a0\u00bb (i.e. the law) is \u2018difficile \u00e0 mettre en \u0153uvre\u2019 (i.e. is hard to make \u2018work\u2019 the way it should) and there is much difference between judges in regards to application<\/p>\n

\"woman-73403_640\"<\/a><\/p>\n

My thoughts upon leaving the forum\u00a0:<\/p>\n

– It is criminal what a man forces a woman to go through just to be safe and secure<\/p>\n

– It is human to be the damaged man, but, damaging others is not the human a man wants to be<\/p>\n

– It is redeeming that occasionally a young, male \u2018victimizing\u2019 client presents with the desire to work on himself, so that he could 1) know and accept himself more 2) learn to communicate feelings more successfully (with his girlfriend) and 3) develop an expression of frustration and anger in safer and more healthier ways.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

At the moment I don\u2019t have clients victimized by domestic violence in my practice in Paris. So going to the 2nd Annual International Forum on Domestic Violence recently came out of a longstanding want to better understand one of the worst types of relationship outcomes and life situation traps, that a poor woman and a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1001030,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[820],"tags":[1218,1117,25,1219,1220,87,1221,93,1222,1223],"class_list":["post-4198","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-relationshipsmarriageandthefamily","tag-annual-international-forum-on-domestic-violence","tag-barry-dsouza","tag-counselling","tag-domestic-violence","tag-paris","tag-psychotherapy","tag-safety-plan","tag-support","tag-victimized","tag-vigiliance"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\nDomestic Violence Sensitivities and Reminders - L'Association canadienne de counseling et de psychoth\u00e9rapie<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.ccpa-accp.ca\/domestic-violence-sensitivities-and-reminders\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"fr_FR\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Domestic Violence Sensitivities and Reminders - L'Association canadienne de counseling et de psychoth\u00e9rapie\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"At the moment I don\u2019t have clients victimized by domestic violence in my practice in Paris. 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